This is what you didn’t want. You approached it jokily with some nervous laughter, and just enough of a cautious tone to let me know that you’d really rather I didn’t ever do this. “Just never write about me in your column, okay?” I remember you saying. You didn’t want me to ever write about us.
Picture the scene; he and I wear the same shy smiles. We exchange fleeting, nervous glances now and then, before our eyes fall to our laps once more. This is a classic “start of a first date” situation; we are tense, excited, our minds dancing with questions for this stranger sitting before us.
“Looking for a girl with low standards and no gag reflex!”
Those honeyed words on a profile were my introduction to the modern dating phenomenon that is Tinder. Understandably, they did nothing to disprove my long standing opinion of the increasingly popular app (“Christ, I’m not that lonely”) but after a pal revealed she actually found her boyfriend after a fateful right swipe, I swallowed my pride and pressed download. I mean, it’s 2014 – does anybody meet their other halves “in a bar on a night out with the girls” anymore?
I’m writing this on what I presume to be the eve of The Sun’s second round of ‘Check ‘em Tuesday’ (unless the newspaper has come to its senses and dropped the campaign – I’m doubtful). If you haven’t heard of it by now, the coyly named ‘Check ‘em Tuesday’ is The Sun’s latest cynical attempt to rebrand its infamous page 3 as something other than a creepy 1970s hangover.
Sick of being accosted by Rector Campaigners on Library Hill? Me too. A campaigner almost punched me in the face with a Snowden flyer today, screaming with bloodshot eyes that “I DESERVE PRIVATE E-MAILS DAMMIT!” I moved on, not wanting to get into an argument while I was already late for class, but I couldn’t help but think to myself just how… belittling it is that Edward Snowden is a genuine candidate for Glasgow University Rector.
On that note, let’s talk about game characters who should be Rector.
I fucking love an urban myth. They’re great conversation starters, ice breakers and friendship cementers. We’ve all heard them, usually starting with the classic: “my pal’s brother’s second cousin”, or “no, no seriously it’s actually my mate’s mate!” Here’s a list of some of my favourites:
It seems only inevitable that a Hunger Games Video Game is going to come out sooner or later, what with how Suzanne Collins’ cash-cow has begun to moo indignantly every time somebody mentions the decision to turn the final book – Mockingjay – into two movies. However with the somewhat lacklustre games sitting on the next-gen shelf of G–Force or Game shops, a well-designed Hunger Games video game (HGVG) could be so damn cool!
So here are the 7 things a HGVG would need to be good.